Rescue Rangers

Top Shelf

Chip ‘n Dale Rescue Rangers

Sometimes, some crimes go slipping through the cracks. Luckily, these two anthropomorphic rodents are on the case. Finding lost kittens, picking up the slack.

If you need help, just call…

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GMZ - #2-14
tetris
142---The-Royal-Guard
on her majestys

On Her Majesty’s Sega Mega Drive

Asterix and the Power of the Gods Review

This week’s edition of On Her Majesty’s Sega Mega Drive is an oddity. As we know by now, this series covers Mega Drive games that never made it into America, but saw an audience in the UK. Usually, the reason for this is that the game in question based on a franchise that’s madly popular in Britain, but non-existent in America. Yet, today, we have this: Asterix and the Power of the Gods, developed by Core Design shortly before they hit the big time with Tomb Raider. Asterix, while not unheard of, is a definite French comic book icon (much like Tintin), making a UK release a slightly odd choice –a bit like releasing a Beano game in continental Europe.

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Clu Clu Land - Box Art

Pixel Gallery

Clu Clu Land

Retro Platforms: Nintendo Entertainment System

Platform Reviewed: Nintendo Entertainment System

Everyone knows that underwater blimps and sea urchins have some of the most hostile relationships known to humanity. Well, the sea urchins are definitely sinister villains, but I’m not exactly sure what kind of a creature the playable protagonist is supposed to be; what I do know though is that the main character’s name is Bubbles, which automatically makes her one of the coolest retro characters ever. Bubbles is a treasure hunter who wants to find golden loot in an underwater mystery maze, but it’s never really made clear whether the urchins are hunting her down out of evilness, or out of her secretly being a thief. Either way, Clu Clu Land actually avoids many undesired tropes of underwater levels by having an entirely unique manner of control, one that focuses on nonstop forward momentum and pole-based turning. It’s certainly creative, but is the gameplay actually fun?
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Jurassic Park Title

The Retro Critic

Jurassic Park

To celebrate the release of new movie Jurassic World, I thought I’d talk about that Jurassic Park game on the NES.

Of course, 1MoreCastle already boasts a fab video review of that game (see Episode 9 of The Backlog with Joe Walker) so, being one sneaky fellow, I instead picked the Game Boy version to look at.

Incidentally, they’re both basically the exact same game.
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wake uplg

Raising a Gamer

Retro Lullabies

After a slightly longer than anticipated hiatus, Raising a Gamer will slowly start to return to it’s normal schedule. I remember how tough it was with one baby and planned for that, I underestimated how exhausting it would be with two! Read More

MyTwoGils

My Two Gils

Raising a Gamer-Friendly Cat

Hello there Internet people! I’ve got a riddle for you:

It usually arrived in your life without you expecting it or asking for it. Now it stalks you most of the day hoping you’ll feed it and complaining when you don’t. Whatever you talk about, it just seems to reply nonsense and never leave you alone no matter how many times you ask. Every time you’re on a computer, it jumps at you making your online experience terrible. It pisses on everything you love and hold dear, it shits in front of your face then acts like a victim. It knocks down all your achievements and you have a strange suspicion that it wants to genuinely hurt you sometimes. In fact, you often wonder how many of them are roaming in your neighborhood, ready to jump at you. In the end, though, you really pity the poor creatures and their seemingly senseless behaviors. So, what is it?

A Gator? No! I was talking about a cat. Why would you…? Oh. Well this is awkward…
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MOMMA

1 More Countdown

Top 10 Worst Mothers in Video Games

Hey everyone, it’s great to be back. I was so busy with work that I had to postpone my lists here on this site. To show just how long it’s been I’ve kept the original opening to this blog. Enjoy!

It was just Mothers Day in the United States, and if you’re just finding this out now in my list, you’re a horrible child! In honor of the holiday I decided to count down the worst mothers in video games.

These are the mothers you give weeds instead of flowers, rotten cheese instead of chocolate, and a discount card from the dollar store. Like with all my lists there will be one character per franchise, and only retro games count!

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141---return-to-castle-trope-enstein
on her majestys

On Her Majesty’s Sega Mega Drive

Mr. Nutz Review

In 1994, Ocean Software came up with the bright idea of creating a mascot for the Sega Mega Drive. A genius idea; loads of kids loved the console, and it’s always a good idea to hook them into the business early. So, they set upon coming up with a cute and cuddly fellow with just a little bit of attitude, one that had cool trainers (‘sneakers’ in American English) and could run as fast as the wind. Truly an inspir– wait, this is all very familiar, isn’t it? Hot off the booming popularity of Sonic in Europe (some might call it a Sonic boom), Ocean created their own European-only counterpart: Mr Nutz.

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140---Patience-is-the-Companion-of-Wisdom
Bonk's Revenge - Box Art

Pixel Gallery

Bonk’s Revenge

Retro Platforms: Game Boy, TurboGrafx-16

Platform Reviewed: TurboGrafx-16

When a giant dinosaur somehow manages to steal half of the freaking moon, it’s up to an unhealthily meat-obsessed and generally impatient caveman to save the day! It’s never really explained how the science for any of this makes sense, nor do we ever find out why the caveman’s ultimate rival is named after the pleasant act of salivation. In actuality, the story to Bonk’s Revenge is probably the game’s weakest element; it’s really just a basic excuse for Bonk to go on another quest to terrorize every living creature that dares to stand in his way. But in terms of level structure and overall gameplay, is Bonk’s Revenge a superior game to its predecessor? Are the controls notably improved, are there more gameplay mechanics, and is the overall presentation enhanced?
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on her majestys

On Her Majesty’s Sega Mega Drive

Brian Lara Cricket Review

[Author note: I swear to Miyamoto, this will be the last sports game review you’ll see in a while, promise. Thanks for sticking with the series and please enjoy the next edition of On Her Majesty’s Sega Mega Drive]

I live in fear. See, I have these dreams where I’m running but feel like I’m falling at the same time, desperately trying to escape and stay alive. I feel my tormentor looming on me, its massive presence casting a massive shadow on me, blocking out the dim moonlight. It chases me. Haunts me. I run as fast as I can, left, and right, through the field, trying to avoid the cold, dead, white figures, twisting through, trying to find an exit. I look back – it gains on me, and I yelp. I turn around, but I lose my balance, and topple into one of the figures. I splay out on the ground, and the shadow gets thicker and thicker. Nowhere to run. I can’t do anything but cry. It rushes towards me, the tears streaming out of my eyes, and that’s when I wake up in a cold sweat. This is precisely the effect that Brian Lara Cricket on the Sega Mega Drive can have on you.

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Dash Galaxy

The Retro Critic

Dash Galaxy In The Alien Asylum

Dash Galaxy may sound like a brand of washing up liquid but it’s so much more.

Buck Rogers, Flash Gordon, they were mere preludes to the true all-American space hero that is Dash Galaxy.

If you’re wondering who the heck Dash Galaxy is then you’ve clearly never played or heard of Dash Galaxy In The Alien Asylum, Dash Galaxy’s greatest Dash Galaxy adventure.

And if you think I’m saying the name Dash Galaxy too much that’s because I am.
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The Guardian Legend

Top Shelf

The Guardian Legend

Are you a fan of action-adventure? Shmups? Get the best of both worlds in this great, yet somewhat overlooked, hybrid.

Did I mention it’s set in space and you get to play as an aerobot transformer, with a human form and an aircraft form? Check the video below to hear all about it.

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MyTwoGils

My Two Gils

What your buffet behavior says about your retrogaming collection

Hello there! Welcome to the first personality quiz in 1 More Castle HISTORY!

While you are busy printing this out to circle the answers, I will be by the beach, downing some Tequila. Or perhaps I will be at the hotel buffet, stuffing my face as always. The apprehension of my vacation’s buffet is probably what inspired this column, unless it was the fact that I’m leaving in a couple of days and needed to think of something FAST!
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GMZ - #2-13

GMZ

GMZ #2-13 – Conspiracy! Blackmail! Bailey!

Brian Crecente and John Romero Spotted Together Looking at Real Estate

By Weir Neckst

Secret Lair

And we believe them

Two gaming “legends,” John Romero (who is mostly known for being the less successful of the two Johns from id Software, and subsequently telling everyone how much of his bitch they are) and Brian Crecente (known for….doing….something) were recently spotted together in New Jersey, shopping for real estate. The two met in a Starbucks, and poured through property books, before visiting New Jersey real estate agent, Frank Frankinson. Frankinson showed Crecente and Romero through several properties, mostly shady warehouses.
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