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1 More Countdown

Top 10 Failed Floaters

You’re probably reading the title of this list and wondering, what the hell is a failed floater? Well, I suppose I’ll tell you. Failed floaters are the video game characters that should really know how to swim (based on their species, other games, or dialogue), but just can’t. They drown, or get flung out of the water. These are the characters who ruin your suspension of disbelief.

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2 Decades Late

Drakkhen

This past weekend, I did a thing. You see, I kind of, sort of ran out of Super Nintendo game ideas so I asked you guys on Twitter. Honestly, I only really expected one or two answers. Instead, I got a bunch of suggestions. D’awww, you guys. So, I will take those suggestions as you giving me free advice on how to keep you reading and one by one, I will review all of those requests.

Additionally, it is now open season. Have a game you want me to review? Let me know. I will review them all, first come, first served. The first suggestion was made by 1 More Castle’s own Zack Smith. Zack wanted to see me review the SNES RPG Drakkhen. And so it is.
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Super 3D Noah's Ark

The Retro Critic

Super Noah’s Ark 3D

A lot has been said about the infamous Super Noah’s Ark 3D.

From AVGN to our very own Eric Bailey, who covered the game’s possible re-release some time ago, it’s proven very challenging for most reviewers to not talk about this unofficial Wisdom Tree Super Nintendo game.

I was going to keep it for Review A Bad Game Day (August 8th) but, since I just missed Review A Great Game Day and very few games bring me quite as much joy as Super Noah’s Ark 3D, I think it’s worth reviewing it now and including it in both categories. Besides, there’s a new Noah movie out now AND goats are “in” with the recent release on Steam of that Goat Simulator.

Now, don’t get me wrong, Super Noah’s Ark 3D is dumb. Read More

GMZ - #12

GMZ

GMZ #12 – Daniel Lamplugh, Tamagotchi, Link’s Sentence, & Kanye+Daisy?

GMZ co-founder Daniel Lamplugh arrested arrested after nude rampage in streets of small Indiana town

By Alyx Warvyk

Daniel Descent

GMZ co-founder, film director, and oil tycoon Daniel Lamplugh was recently arrested under one count of public indecency, one count of usage of a controlled substance, and two counts of assault after rampaging in the nude in the small suburban town of Keochip, Indiana. This is Lamplugh’s third violent criminal offense. “He was under the influence of over 24oz of cocaine at the time of arrest,” stated Police Chief Max Force, “It’s truly a human marvel that his heart didn’t burst.” Lamplugh has recently been the perpetrator of several sordid events. “I think the money and power went to his head,” offered GMZ reporter B. Byrd, “He even tried to force Pierre out of the company at one point.”

Lamplugh states that he will refuse to plea guilty, regardless of bargains. He is currently residing in the Keochip police precinct.
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RetroHate

Level 3 Trident of Clumsiness

Welcome once again all you retro ladies and old school gents, today’s subject in the constant testing of the LHC (Loud Hateron Cannon) is the N64, specifically its mutant, three-pronged abomination called a “controller.”

I use the term “controller” loosely here as its shape looks more like the broken tip of Aquaman’s trident. Seriously, tape the thing to a broomstick, drape yourself in a bedsheets and you’ve got the perfect Atlantian costume. I’m not sure what kind of three-handed alien ergonomics Nintendo was going for here, but it definitely wasn’t human.
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PandC

1 More Countdown

Top 10 Console Point and Click Games

One of my favorite video game genre is the adventure genre. More specifically, I really enjoy adventure point and click games. These are the games where you click everything and combine everything, because even the most mundane items can save the world.

It’s a shame that these games are slowly fading away from the public eye, because they were some of the most creative games ever made. Luckily we still have new point and click games like Machinarium, Broken Age, and The Wolf Among Us keeping the genre alive.

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It Came From Japan

Splatterhouse Wanpaku Graffiti

こんにちは!  Today we have an awesome side scrolling game with tons of movie references from Namco for the Famicom.  It’s Splatterhouse Wanpaku Graffiti!  Now you may be familiar with the Splatterhouse game that recently game out on the Xbox 360, or the Sega Genesis version but this game is actually quite different.  This version isn’t as creepy as its counter parts since it features super deformed characters which I think add to the game.  Nothing like a chibi guy with a hockey type mask carrying a big knife/axe, this doesn’t remind me of a specific movie franchise at all. :)  Like all the other games I post here on It Came From Japan, you do not need to know Japanese to enjoy it!
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N64 Connoisseur

N64 Review #10 – Mace: The Dark Age

Once upon a time, a little game called Mortal Kombat was born. It was the king of fighting games because it did things no other fighting games had done before. People were drawn to its shocking violence and for some reason captivating characters. Like most good ideas, a lot of people flat out stole it. This began an age of Mortal Kombat clones, most of them bad. Enter in my 10th N64 review, Mace: The Dark Age.
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Jackie Chan's Action Kung Fu

The Retro Critic

Jackie Chan’s Action Kung Fu

Long before there was a Jackie Chan animated series (see 2000′s Jackie Chan Adventures), there was the cartoonish game Jackie Chan’s Action Kung Fu.

And loads of Jackie Chan movies, obviously…

The game was first released on the NES back in 1990 then was adapted for the TurboGrafx-16 only a year later. Both games followed the same plots and were altogether pretty similar. That said, the latter version was infinitely more polished and interestingly a tad more challenging.

The story is standard Mario-style fare as Jackie’s sister is kidnapped by a creepy monster and brought to some faraway location where you need to obviously get to in order to save her.
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GMZ - The Future
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We're Back Genesis

The Retro Critic

We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Story

Back in 1993, dinosaurs were all the rage: Jurassic Park was out in cinemas and so was…

We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Story, which was, oddly enough, also produced by Steven Spielberg.

Of course, it being a kids’ movie in the 90′s, the film spawned a few video games. Even if the film itself was a major box-office bomb and flopped rather hard.

Let’s take a quick look at the different We’re Back! games and try to find at least one decent 8-bit or 16-bit adaptation.

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